Back in David Letterman’s 80s prime, he’d come across a line he considered it funny and would repeat it for weeks. This absurdity would be funny at first, lose all traces of humor, and then come out the other end being funny. One night he was doing something about a conversation he had heard between two less than gifted men and one of them apparently said, “yeah, them bats is smart. They got radar.” And a new riff was born. It of course stuck in my head.
Last night we had a bat in the house. It must have gotten in while we were dragging the cats inside after Arya had a fight with one of the feral cats that haunt this neighborhood. We had just settled down when all of the cats congregated in the living room, looking at the ceiling. Something dark was flying around our living room. I thought it was a bird but nope, it was a small bat. Our cats thought it was nice that it came inside to visit and were going to insure that it never left. We tried leaving the front door open and chasing it to the door but it never got near the door. At one point, one of us said, “bats is NOT smart”.
I was amazed at exactly how athletic our young cats are. Arya was getting off five foot vertical jumps from the floor trying to get the thing and at that point the bat was probably grateful we have eight foot ceilings. I raced to my wife’s computer for suggestions from the Interwebs. One site said turn off all the lights (true, it was hanging around the lamps) and turn on an outside porch light. So we turned off all the lights inside. Then Sansa jumped on the back of the loveseat, timed her leap, and brought the bat down. She dragged it into the dining room with glee and the bat was giving off this high pitched shriek. I got the bat separated from its torturer with my broom and it flew up to the dining room ceiling. Eventually it made its way to the laundry room. We sealed the room off from the rest of the house, opened the back door, and started shooing it again. The damn dumb thing finally flew outside. Whew.
We ended up with a lot of bugs inside the house but the cats took care of some of those. I cleaned up some dead moths this morning. As far as the bat goes, I am sure it is hanging in our garage, resting, waiting for an open car door.