The Fox in the Front Yard

Fox n' Pumpkins

This spring my wife got this fox figure for outside. It serves a couple purposes. First, it’s very decorative. Second, we have a few low-life, mouth-breathing inbreds that drive far too fast down our street. We move this statue to various places on the yard. So if you’re coming home from the bar late at night, your lights briefly pick up the shadow of something doglike close to the street. Even the drunkest slack-jawed cousin-fucker will take their foot off the gas; it’s just a reflex.

This fall, the fox is part of an autumn display. A couple of large pumpkins that were on sale at our local grocery plus a faux straw bale from WalHell equal a nice little seasonal setting. We’ll bring him into the garage post-Halloween. By then the roads will be getting a sheen of snow and ice. That tends to make the pock-marked pencil dicks take their feet off the gas as well. And there will be peace along our street, which is one of the few good things about an interminably long winter.

Drive careful folks!

About jeroljohnson

I guess I'm the crying on the inside kind of clown
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